truth: the internet is bad.
truth: the internet is good.
today, i say the internet is amazing.
there is a lot of talk out there about blogging. good talk. and bad talk. i've done my share of thinking about it. maybe too much sometimes. after going around in circles time and time again, i always seem to come back to the same thought. there are still more good people out there than bad.
and that is why i continue to share my life here. and i'm so grateful that i do. so very grateful.
let me tell you why. here's where the story begins.
Lincoln. my son. he was born almost 3 years ago in the heat of an Arizona summer. everything seemed to go well with his birth…nothing abnormal which we were so thankful for.
at about 6 months, we started to notice what seemed to be a cute little head tilt he would do. and that's all i thought it was. just something cute.
as more and more people started to ask me about it, i began to wonder. that's when i went back and started looking through every picture i had of him. and in every picture, the tilt was the same. worry set in and i made a phone call. to a chiropractor.
that was over two years ago.
since that time Lincoln has been evaluated by:
a chiropractor
a pediatrician
a physical therapist
an optometrist
a neurosurgeon
another physical therapist
an MRI scan
another pediatrician
another chiropractor
another optometrist
and of course, two parents who were constantly stretching his neck muscles through many, many tears. oh and don't forget the collar that we made him wear for months. poor kid.
you could say he's been around. 🙂
but even after all of that. no one. no one could explain why he continued to tilt. he's an anomaly, they said. he'll grow out of it, i was told. and just keep stretching him and maybe someday…
after many prayers and tears of my own, i decided i just needed to put up a white flag and stop trying to change him. i felt like i needed to accept him just the way he was and hope the world would treat him the same.
not more than a few days later, i received a comment on my blog that said this:
Your kids are adorable -I just wanted to mention something about congenital torticollis -I'm sure you've gone down this road, but just in case, has your son seen an eye specialist? This is to rule out Superior Oblique (eye muscle) Palsy which can manifest as a head turn in very young toddlers/babies. Kids with this will actually tilt their head in order to align what they are visually seeing as double into a single image.
-Connie
I had taken him to get his eyes evaluated. twice. but i was told he was fine. immediately I googled the palsy she spoke of and spent hours reading. yes. yes. yes. i thought. this could be it.
the next morning i made another phone call. to a pediatric ophthalmologist.
with great anticipation i took Lincoln to the appointment. it took the doctor all of 5 minutes to tell me this is exactly what Lincoln has. what he has always had. this Superior Oblique Palsy which causes one of his eyes to drift upward, impairing his vision, which as a result causes him to tilt his head to align his eyes.
all the way home i cried.
could this be the answer after two and a half years?
i was happy. i was sad. i was grateful. i was angry. i was relieved. i was worried.
but after all those emotions boiled up, the one that surfaced was gratitude.
for connie (who is an optometrist). a stranger who doesn't know me or my son. but she was here and she cared.
now we are on the road to surgery. a frightening road indeed. but we are back on a road that i once thought was a dead end.
so many thoughts in my head at this moment.
what i want to say most is thank you.
to you who are reading and know me…thank you.
to you who are reading and don't know me…thank you.
thank you for caring about one girl and her family. that's all.
just thank you.
(most photos by tara whitney)
